Brett Favre's Daily Schedule

7 AM: Wake up DeAnna to tell her that I haven't decided if I'm going to the store today.
8:30 AM: Shower. Opt not to shave so I can keep the grizzled veteran stubble.
9:00 AM: Watch SportsCenter and pray that I get mentioned within the first five minutes.
9:15 AM: Shoot John Anderson a text thanking him for bringing up my name in a completely unrelated story. Suck on that, Milwaukee Brewers!
10:00 AM: Grab quick bagel as I head off to train with a bunch of high school kids.
12:00 PM: Lunch break! Shoot Aaron Rodgers an e-mail that just says "Watch ur back. Brett"
4:00 PM: Arrive home, check voicemail. Hope that Berman and Madden aren't the only ones that have called me.
4:15 PM: Curse as I realize that all 30 voicemails are from Berman and Madden
4:30 PM: Wake DeAnna up from her nap to tell her that I still haven't decided if I'm going to the store today.
5:00 PM: Watch Around the Horn and PTI to see what Woody Paige and Michael Wilbon think about me.
6:00 PM: Contemplate taking the Packers offer to stay retired for 20 million. Stop seriously considering it when Mike Greenberg brings up that I'd be a hypocrite for taking it on the 6:00 SportsCenter.
7:00 PM: Finish my Aaron Rodgers voodoo doll.
7:15 PM: Eat dinner with DeAnna. Pray that she asks me about coming back to the Packers.
7:50 PM: Announce to DeAnna that I will be going to the store.
7:55 PM: Announce to DeAnna that I will not be going to the store.
8:45 PM: Turn on ESPN Classic to see if I'm on it.
9:00 PM: Crank call Mike McCarthy.
10:00 PM: Announce to DeAnna that I have yet to decide if I'm going to bed.
10:30 PM: Tearfully tell DeAnna that I've had a great run, but it's time for me to go to bed.
1:00 AM: Go to bed.